Where's my Money!?/Transcript
Act I Act II Act III Act IV Act V Act VI Act VII Brendan: So Phineas, have you & Isabella got my money? Phineas: No, no we don't. Stewie: Huh. That's funny, I could have sworn you 2 got his money. Isabella: Yeah, we don't have it. Sorry. Stewie: Huh. Alright then. (Brendan & Stewie throw a stick at Phineas & Isabella, causing them to get angry) Phineas: What was that for!? Brendan: For stealing my money, you son of a *****! Stewie: Yeah! (Takes out his pistol.) Now where's his money!? Isabella: I told you, we don't have it! (Stewie attempts to shoot, but the gun has no ammo, so he throws it at Isabella) D'oh! Act VIII Act IX Act X Brendan: WHERE'S MY MONEY!? HUH? WHERE'S MY BLOODY MONEY!? Phineas: Brendan, watch your language, please! Brendan: SHUT UP, PHINEAS! YOU SON OF A BISCUIT! How much did you spend on these fake mustaches? Isabella: 2.99 Stewie: Seriously!? Isabella: Yeah, seriously. (Brendan & Stewie take out their hammers and hit Phineas & Isabella's right legs, causing them to scream in pain.) Phineas: Listen to yourself, Brendan, give us some time- (Brendan & Stewie hit Phineas & Isabella's left legs, causing them to scream in pain again.) Stewie: They're not gonna tell us are they, Brendan? Brendan: No, I don't think so, Stewie. (He puts a tranquilizer dart into the gun, then shoots Phineas in the chest.) Isabella: PHINEAS! Phineas: (Groaning.) Isabella, I love you. (Closes his eyes.) Isabella: (Crying) Oh, Phineas. (Turns angrily at Brendan.) YOU BASTARD! YOU KILLED HIM! Brendan: He's not dead, just unconscious. Isabella: You mean.... He's not dead? Stewie: No, you *****, he's alive! Isabella: Oh. Still, there was no need to shoot him! Stewie: Phineas was your weakness. Now, with him now unconscious, will you please give me & Brendan the money? Isabella: (Sighs) Alright, alright, here's your stinkin' money, you win. (hands a pack of cash) Now will you go away? Brendan: Oh yeah. Let's go, Stewie. That was pretty easy, if I do say so myself! (Isabella pulls out the tranquilizer dart out of Phineas' chest, puts a bandage over it, sprays him with water, he wakes up) Phineas: Isabella, they got our money! Isabella: Don't worry, Phineas! The money they just got from me are fake! They're not gonna suspect a thing! Also, Stacy is gonna distract Stewie & Brendan and then arrest them! Phineas: How? Isabella: Stacy's been hired as an undercover cop. Her job is doing just fine. Phineas: How will this work? Isabella: First off, Stacy took her time to disguise as Leela from Futurama, who is considered to be attractive by many Futurama nerds. Phineas: OK, go on. Isabella: Stacy will pretend to be a prostitute, using Brendan's & Stewie's fake money. Once she says the keyword "Fry", the Danville PD will go in like this and they're gonna get busted! Chorus: Busted! Phineas: What was that? Isabella: Don't mind that. Act XI (Stacy is hiding in a luxury car in an alleyway, disguised as Leela from Futurama, Brendan & Stewie approach it, while Phineas & Isabella watch from across the street & snicker.) Stacy: So, Brendan, you've got a girlfriend? Brendan: Yes, yes I do. Her name is Louise Elizabeth Rumble. Wait, are you that one-eyed alien Leela from Futurama? Stacy: Yeah, I'm her alright. Stewie: Wow, what a strange coincidence! Brendan: I've never seen you before in person! I...I think I like you. Stacy: Every man's crazy for me. Please give me your money. Brendan: If you say so. (Stacy takes Brendan's & Stewie's money) Stacy: Anyways, is Louise cute? Brendan: Yes, yes she is. (Stewie sits in the front of the car, pretending to be a racecar driver) Stewie: Vroom, vroom! And the new winner of Swamp Oil 500 is Stewart Gilligan Griffin! WOO! Brendan: Wow, I never thought that I was liked by a girl that can only be seen on TV! Who's your boyfriend anyway? Stacy: My former boyfriend was Fry. (Police sirens are heard in the background) Phineas: Here they come! (A fleet of DPD cars approach the alleyway, a DPD helicopter flies above the luxury car, Phineas & Isabella are still watching from across the street.) Brendan: What the-? (Stacy unzips her Leela disguise, shows Brendan the police badge & points a gun at him) Stacy: FREEZE! Danville PD! Brendan: Stacy Hirano!? You was a cop all along!? Stacy: Yes, yes I was. Stewie: Now what are we gonna do? Police Officer #1: Come out with your hands up, Townsend! Brendan: Make me, you f*ckin *****! DPD Helicopter Pilot: Don't make the SWAT team shoot you, Townsend! Brendan: Piss off, you *******! SWAT Member: That does it! FIRE IN THE HOLE! (SWAT team rappels from the helicopter & shoots the windows of the luxury car, Stacy manages to get out quick enough, but Stewie & Brendan aren't so lucky, Brendan gets shot in the arm, he falls off the seat & opens the door to fall on the ground) Brendan: OW! MY F*CKING ARM! **** YOU, PHINEAS FLYNN & ANGELICA GARCIA SHAPIRO! YOU F*CKIN DID THIS! Isabella: It's Isabella, you pendejo! Brendan: I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT WORD MEANS, YOU MOTHERF*CKER! Isabella: Ever studied Spanish? Brendan: HELL NO! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS ONCE I GET OUT OF JAIL! YOU'LL-(coughs heavily) I think I lost my voice. Aw, sh*t. Curse you, Phineas & Angelica. I can't believe I fell for that trick! (gets handcuffed) Police Officer #2: Nice work, Stacy Hirano! Stacy: Thanks! I really love working in the Danville PD! I hope I can make a lot of money. (To Brendan, dreamily) See you in the jail cell! Brendan: I swear, you'll f*cking pay for this! Police Officer #1: We'll take this baby & deliver him back to Quahog. (Brendan is put into a SWAT van, while Stewie is tied up & put into a police car) End Credits